The days before the revolution were the best days of my life. But difficulties were beginning. My brother was walking in the street and he was shot. He survived, but he was badly wounded. I got married during the revolution. The area where I lived with my husband was supposed to be safe, but then the bombing and the shooting started. There was a massacre and whoever wanted to live left.

We fled to one city and then another.  At one building, my father in-law was with us and other people I didn’t know, about 22 families who ran away after the massacre. We had hidden them in our building – I remember that they were hungry and there were children crying. My father in-law brought things so I could cook. They told me not to bother cooking for all of them because they said that they were going to die. But I told them that it’s fine; I am cooking for the children who were crying because I can’t handle seeing them cry.

I am cooking for the children who were crying because I can’t handle seeing them cry.”

In another city, security forces stormed the house where I was staying with my sister in-law. They put a gun to her head and ripped off her hijab, so I ran upstairs and opened the window and threw myself out. This was from the second floor. There were steel bars on the next level and I landed on them. They punctured my body: in my thigh and in my belly and in the back of my legs, in my shoulder and in my arm. And I was pregnant.

The forces then went out looking for me and they started shooting randomly. They searched but they couldn’t find me.

It took so much time and so much struggle, but finally I made it to Amman, Jordan. I went to CVT. It helped on so many levels. I learned that the mind and the body are connected together, so when memories come to my head, I change my place; I might also watch something that can change my mood, and I might do exercises. I also can change my behavior. I learned that from coming here.

Note: Hiba wrote her full story, titled “For the Children Who were Crying,” in Arabic and English. Download the full story here.

Hiba chose this pseudonym for confidentiality and security purposes.